If you’re lips are saying yes but your body language is saying no; can you blame your date for being confused? You can control what you say, but not the instinctive movements your body makes. If what you’re saying and feeling aren’t in synch, your body language will give you away every time. Correctly reading body language provides instant feedback that can make the difference between a great date and a crash and burn.

Use these tips to read your date’s body language:

The way you hold your body when you’re standing conveys a definite message.

• Legs together. Standing at attention with your legs together is a deferential pose that shows respect. If the person is extremely nervous, it may be an indication that the person is more comfortable in a subservient role and is unable or unwilling to make the first move.
• Legs apart. The iconic power stance (especially when hands are on the hips), standing with your legs apart means you’re in charge. Watch out! This stance can indicate a dominating personality and unwillingness to compromise.
• Toes in. Pointing your big toes toward each other is a sign of insecurity. A person who adopts this stance is feeling awkward and socially uncomfortable.
• Shifting. Shifting your weight indicates that you’re anxious or upset. The weight-shifting is the same comforting movement used to rock a baby and indicates that the person is struggling to remain calm.
• Leaning. If your date leans toward you, it’s a sign that he (or she) is enjoying your company. If your date leans away from you, you’re headed for a crash. You can build trust and perhaps head off that crash by quietly mirroring your date’s body movements.
• Toes facing the door. Watch for this sign before you attempt a good night kiss. If your date’s toes face the door, she’s anxious to escape. If they face you, pucker up.

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